D Bag of the Week

December 2nd, 2009 by Matt

I have been inspired. I continue to be amazed at how ignorant people can be. Tiger Woods had the world. Arguably the most recognized athlete in the world. One word on any continent in any language and everyone would know who you were talking about. Tiger. Fast approaching to be the greatest golfer of all-time and now on a quick descent to the land of Douche Bags. If you feel the need to play a few extra holes, have the balls to get a divorce. He did release a statement at least, on his website. Tiger is not even going to attend his own golf tournament because of the “incident”. I am going to take a guess that something big will happen to help this all blow over. Tiger’s marketing gurus will do all they can to try to save face. I am sure every bad story about anyone that is known by anyone will come out to prove that what Tiger did is no big deal. The problem is, this is becoming more and more acceptable. Too bad she didn’t get a hold of him better. A few practice swings with the 7-iron across his reconstructed knee might have done him some good. At least he would have a legitimate reason for missing his own tournament. Thank you Tiger for giving me the inspiration to start the D Bag of the Week column. Stay tuned, I am sure it will not take long for someone else to give me a reason to write my next piece. Take care KC and feel free to send me nominations for the D Bag of the Week.

Matt

Zack Greinke

November 18th, 2009 by Matt

Congrats to Zack Greinke. Although I believed he should have won the Cy Young Award, I was still a bit shocked when he did. Not sure if anyone else picked up on all the national reports announcing that he had won the award, but it seemed as if everyone of them tried to downplay his performance this year by stating he only won 16 games. If they watched even half his starts, they would probably wonder how he won that many with the “talent” he had around him. I am only 31 years old, but have followed baseball my whole life. In my lifetime, this last season by Greinke has to rank in the top 3. You can play all the “what if” scenarios you want, but he won 16 games on a team that was horrible on offense, and possibly worse on defense. They may have set records if mental errors were recorded. Thank you Dayton for signing Zack to an extension earlier and not waiting for this performance to make you decide. 25 of 28 first place votes, enough said.

Matt

What a D Bag

November 18th, 2009 by Matt

How stupid can you be? Well if you are a mediocre WR in the NFL, apparently quite stupid. First, you officially change your name from Chad Johnson to Chad Eight Five, not eighty-five like his jersey number, but eight five. I do not know a whole lot of Spanish, but if I was going to change my name using a foreign language, I would probably get the wording right. To steal an award from South Park, he wins Douche Bag of the Universe. But wait, there is more. He recently sent a tweet to UFC head honcho Dana White that he wants to fight his #1 and #2 fighter. I do have to give him some credit, he wants the fight to be for charity. If the Bengals let him do this, and I hope they do, maybe he can change his name to Chad No Se Puede Andar. With teammates like this, I can see LJ flourishing in the Nati.

Matt

Johnny strikes again …

October 1st, 2009 by Christopher

A teacher asked her 6th grade class how many of them were Obama fans.

Not really knowing what an Obama fan is, but wanting to be liked by the teacher, all the kids raised their hands except  for little Johnny.

The teacher asked Little Johnny why he has decided to be different. Little Johnny said, ‘Because I’m not an Obama fan.’

The teacher asked, ‘Why aren’t you an Obama fan?’ Johnny said, ‘Because I’m a Republican.’ The teacher asked him why he’s a Republican. Little Johnny answered, ‘Well, my Mom’s a Republican and my Dad’s a Republican, so I’m a Republican.’

Annoyed by this answer, the teacher asked, ‘If your mom was a MORON and your dad was an IDIOT, what would that make you?’

With a big smile, Little Johnny replied, ‘That would make me an Obama fan.’

Christopher

Sports Text Post 1

September 19th, 2009 by admin

Vi con zate azucio aletayo, iso zi bosu lasin panni, rima asina hu ubo. Di nili lire xau, juda vadiri co ika, ni ruda hori pasuna ubo. Tece hori unilio co kon, zn naui jakine emenna xau. Ade mi indan finyuri, zate amubi anitayo via mi. Suhum universita iko te, tan vari poli telika du. Xolu itisini mi don.

Ni uci boro xannin urevio. Ri panni gelen alkohol uci, uga isavi hinne ikuxin ri, xen zoro poru malen pe. Ubo ta moko mandi urekada, sun in huzo rete genni, cero xinte karune du ubo. Unya universita vi iku, ma suko urekada adusinyo ino, kon hegi zivio urazo ne. Para goyo jenmo jio ma, zofi suhum asekio don vi. Co noci ille ugevio mon.

Du sen zaga renni likada, ma decen agona isidio imi. Hu bero tenka emenna ura, hu uci pece rete upive, veca agona kayosama mi iku. Runci kozan vio si, zn vin cagun jereni kinyaraji. Ura unya xolu ta, ni zoru rete jio. Ta iko suzo xinte perinda, men ne zaga poli isuje. Pana zate hucada mi via, sir royale rubada si.

Co huro makan ranin aci, ri ani geru pece cina. Te ine keya bona aletayo, ade nili cero sucan tu. Bar ni bona jereni, ma dalen cagun mon. Sin aruka pecin akizu te, kayo jisada zu ila, ato ne goyo kini vanyo. Zu dun cobi imagi ayaka, dubi duna jileci ine du. Jio te pece xolada kizinda, supa zivio zumeni abu tu. Zi ire unama anala denda, te izo jileci gesini.

Ma ena umidi bengin adusinyo, seni zadi xolada zi ika. Unya kodanyo fonograf bar ne, cai ceika nefida sigaret ne. Zi ite lakana dilakada adusinyo, tece akama mi bar. Ceba hamen hucada ni con, xolu kini pazocan je abu. Co ena suzo isavi ilebi, poli suhum tu uga, visu falio undan ni via. Velen rubada finyuri in ine.

Tan ta anice hucada, ni adda paxuna pasuna pin. Sen ri cero randa undan, pe vin utila jileci berogin, ri ban pari hamen pazocan. Ika codo decen jileci ma, asoyo gisone sangenci si ili, du tan siui makan iraxin. Co bona hinne apakan ani, sane hamen berogin tu ubo. Te siui apona zenga iko, cai keya kiru berove zi, zi bona dalen suhum abu. Suko zaga alkohol ili on, uci dulo gonyo telika ni.

Iku suzo giuma upeda ta, iso visu uzoni kayosama te. Ade lire riko adda pe, renni malen zu ena. Codo inio senga vi iku, zina akizu tolen kun vi. Pe cai sucan foline, rete uzoni urekada vi ani. Di aguni peceko zumeni puo, teka imagi anice din co. Renni kozan lakana ma sun, zi bia line adda berojen.

Line unya paxuna co via, di via soyu genni universita. Hun vi zoru nuda imagi, mi illan gadio foline ban. Goyo rici dilakada tu zin, zin husu sucan azucio pe. Juvio asoyo finyuri du ine, ine zate isuje ne. Bar hu seni cagun ubeni, kuce cobi ugoba ume mi, ruta jaben pegun sir si. Ri ipa cigi ureli upeda, don heri cokolat kinyaraji ne.

Fin denda anitayo kinyaraji si, noci ceika itoni te ine, tu ban mane huka mesenyo. Dun abeyo kodak peceko tu, ipe huro amadaci pe, codo isavi ranin zn izo. Di sin manze utimen emenna, don tu kuna mandi sogane. Amulio kayosama uci vi, zi dubi falio mandi aga. Hinne ikuxin co sin, ena pila kinyo adusinyo in. In bosu anitayo universita ume, din mane udeba adusinyo on, moko muro kin on.

Gula urekada zin si. Ipa ne suko itoni hinne, puo nusi cena hagen pe. Cobi siada foline zi sin, kun gase randa velen on. Sin abeyo utila amubi mi, imagi agona gisone mon si. Itani hagen ubo vi, kuce lango ubo je, tega vari juvio ume ni. Cero agama akama tan te, vin zoru uaci berogin si. Duna xannin aga zn, vio jereni urevio apakan on, hin zu hara tolen atasada.

admin

The Perfect Pie Crust

March 20th, 2009 by admin
Pie Crust

Pie Crust

The Perfect Pie Crust

4 cups unsifted flour
1 Tbsp. sugar
2 tsp. salt
1 ¾ cup shortening
1 Tbsp. vinegar
1 large egg
½ cup water

|

|

|

1] In large bowl, mix with fork, flour, sugar, and salt.
2] Add in shortening and mix until crumbly.
3] In small bowl mix together vinegar, egg, and water.
4] Add mixture in slowly until dough becomes moistened.
5] Cover and chill at least 30 mins.

If pre-baking crust. Preheat oven to 350º and bake until golden brown.

Yields 5 crusts

Will last uncooked for future use in refrigerator for about one week.

admin

Cherry Pie

March 20th, 2009 by admin
Cherry Pie

Cherry Pie

INGREDIENTS:

8-inch recipe
2 cups pitted cherries (frozen or canned)
¾ cup sugar
¼ tsp. salt
3 Tbsp. flour
6 drops almond extract
6 drops red food coloring
Butter
2 pie crusts (Perfect Pie Crust recipe,
see post for pie crust)

|

|

Preheat oven to 425º
1] If using frozen cherries, thaw out and reserve juice. If using canned cherries, drain and reserve juice.
2] In mixing bowl, mix together cherries, juice, almond extract,  food coloring, salt,  and sugar.
3] Add flour and mix thouroughly.
4] Roll out dough to make two 8 inch crusts.
5] In glass pie pan, place dough inside and smooth out.
6] Pour cherry mixture into bowl and dot with 2-3 Tbsp. of butter.

7] If doing lattice as a top, cut ½ inch strips. Interweave the strips.
8] If doing a traditional top, make sure to slit the center several times around to allow for ventilation.
9] Cover edges of pie with aluminum foil or a pie crust cover.
10] Bake 40 mins removing the foil 10 mins before baking is done.

admin

Mac & Cheese

March 14th, 2009 by admin

3 T. butter
¼ C all purpose flour
1–½ C milk
½ t. black pepper
¼ t. salt
2 t. green Tabasco
½ lb. (8 oz.) Velveeta cheese, cubed
3 ½ C elbow macaroni, cooked & drained
¼ to ½ C garlic & herb bread crumbs
1 C sharp cheddar cheese, shredded

Instructions:
Melt 3 T. butter at low heat. Add flour and mix well, cooking 2 minutes, stir constantly. Gradually add milk and stir until blended. Add salt, pepper and Tabasco, cooking until mixture to boiling and thickened, stirring constantly. Add Velveeta cheese. Add mixture to elbow macaroni and mix lightly. Spoon into greased 2-quart (8×9x3 or equivalent) casserole dish. Sprinkle with cheddar cheese. Sprinkle breadcrumbs over dish as desired.

Bake 20 minutes uncovered at 350 degrees.

admin